Denial, how I hate thee…

Posted originally on the 2nd of September 2010 (I was too lazy to copy-paste until now)

So tomorrow I go back to school, and I’m freaking out. I don’t what class I’m in, who’s in my class and if I’ll know anyone who’s in my class. I haven’t finished the summer reading, or started writing my report on my two-week work experience. I also haven’t reached 55 000 words in “The Way Wars Are Won”, which I wanted to do by the end of August.

I also STILL haven’t finished editing chapter 3 of “Kenna’s Choice” or finished reading “Lolita”.

AND I start at 8.30, not 10, meaning I have to wake up at 6.30 a.m. That’s in less than 8 hours people. *gulp* Then again, I never get enough sleep during the school year…

Anyway…

Earlier this week, I truly panicked and abandoned my computer for two days, during which I did nothing by waste time in front of the TV, in total denial of my homework. I also stopped writing.

But tomorrow, after school, I will start reading “The French Lieutenant’s Woman” (here’s hoping it’s better than “Dubliners” which is, in my opinion, badly written, boring and each short story never goes anywhere) and do some writing.

Word Count from the 1st of August to today:

1st    Sunday    391
2nd    Monday    65
3rd    Tuesday    114
4th    Wednesday    528
5th    Thursday    33
6th    Friday    672
7th    Saturday    0
8th    Sunday    0
9th    Monday    0
10th    Tuesday    0
11th    Wednesday    846
12th    Thursday    808
13th    Friday    0
14th    Saturday    678
15th    Sunday    859
16th    Monday    160
17th    Tuesday    1405
18th    Wednesday    245
19th    Thursday    1426
20th    Friday    277
21st    Saturday    0
22nd    Sunday    15
23rd    Monday    0
24th    Tuesday    0
25th    Wednesday    1080
26th    Thursday    0
27th    Friday    0
28th    Saturday    61
29th    Sunday    0
30th    Monday    0
31st    Tuesday    0
1st    Wednesday    120
2nd    Thursday    0

Hopefully, September will be a better month. “If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it. The more things you do, the more you can do.” And I will be busy–homework, school, social life (maybe), reading, writing, editing, possibly critiquing for my critique partner as well as blogging and tweeting.

Movies I’ve seen:

• Mad Max
• Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior
• Mad Max 3: Beyond Thunderdome [I LOVE all three movies, especially the second]
• Cocoon (meh)
• The Shining (AMAZING)

And I think that’s it…

Kayleigh fails at writing

I don't know why but lately, well, look at the word count:

18th    Wednesday    245
19th    Thursday    1426
20th    Friday    277
21st    Saturday    0
22nd    Sunday    15
23rd    Monday    0
24th    Tuesday    0
25th    Wednesday   314


As for editing Kenna's Choice... It started out fairly well, but I haven't made any changes since... Sunday? I'm not actually sure. All I know is I've been wasting time on the internet these past few days, feeling tired and doing very little reading. The very little reading=a few pages of Lolita and the 91-page play "Our Country's Good" for school.

Yeah. Maybe it's the heat getting to me, and the lack of sleep. Or lack of leaving the house.
Sometime soon, we're going to see Ondine, which I think will be good for me. Then maybe I should see my friends.

Words behind on goal for TWWAW: 2279


Depressing thing is that some writer write more than that in one day. I guess I could catch up if I had one or two fantastic writing days.

Zombies vs Unicorns giveaway

Jackson Pearce will give away an arc of Zombies vs Unicorns when she reaches 2500 followers on twitter. Even if you don't want the arc, go follow her. She's funny, nice and an amazing writer.

The glorious wordcount of Tuesday the 17th

1405

"I bought the airline. [...] It seemed neater."

*****There WILL be SPOILERS***** (Search "End Spoilers")

Inception: Oh. My. God. Wow. I mean not only is the idea of the movie very original, but you also get the sexy Joseph Gordon-Levitt who has grown up a LOT since I last saw him in "10 things I hate about you".

Now this annoying kid critic, Jackson, said "Inception" was confusing—yes, it has the potential to be confusing, but I found it easy to understand. By potential, I'm referring to the levels of dreams. The main characters are on a plane asleep while dreaming that they're asleep in a van while dreaming that they're asleep in a hotel while dreaming that they're on a mountain and some are asleep there but dreaming of being in Limbo.

Don't get what I'm saying? That's okay—it makes perfect sense when you watch the movie.

Re: Jackson: the adult he was talking to in that video agreed and said even he was confused. Um, I'm 16 and my sister's 13 yet we both understood the movie. And of course my dad understood it.

When I told my dad this, I added that it reminded me of "Pink Floyd: The Wall"—somebody on IMDB said the transition from present to past and back wasn't clear. I thought it was.

One thing about the special effects: they were so good, it seemed normal. As in there really was no gravity, or the city really was folding in half.

And Mal. Oh, Mal. She's such an angry, bitter character—and reminded me so much of Pippa in Libba Bray's Gemma Doyle Trilogy. Both are trapped in an other world—dream for Mal, magical, in a way, for Pippa—and both wish their loved ones would join them, and even try to trick them then grow angry when they refuse.

V for Vendetta: Again, wow. V is a character you should hate, I mean he tortures Evey, but you simply don't. And even though I knew it was Hugo Weaving's voice, I couldn't recognise it. He sounded so different.

Amazing movie. And the main theme is something I cannot stand: injustice. So seeing Sutler die and everyone "win" was very satisfying.

And Valerie's story was so sad...so beautiful, especially this part:

But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you.

That's when I started tearing up.

When you wish you could have written a certain piece of dialogue, or wish you could have created that character, or wish you could have put one of your characters in that situation, then you know it's good.

In my case, I wish I'd written Valerie's autobiography.

*****END SPOILERS*****

Writing

So far, August in word count looks like this:

1st    Sunday    391
2nd    Monday    65
3rd    Tuesday    114
4th    Wednesday    528
5th    Thursday    33
6th    Friday    672
7th    Saturday    0
8th    Sunday    0
9th    Monday    0
10th    Tuesday    0
11th    Wednesday    846
12th    Thursday    808
13th    Friday    0
14th    Saturday    678
15th    Sunday    859
16th    Monday    160
17th    Tuesday    12 (so far)

Total: 5166
Should be: 7515

Tomorrow, 10.30 a.m.: Buffy Season 7 Marathon

Buffy Marathon: Oh yeah! My sister and I want to see in how little time we can watch the entire season 7. The only breaks will be: toilet and food. There are 22 episodes and each episode is about 42 minutes: 22*42=924. 924/60=15.4

That's 15.4 hours of Buffy. Broken up by lunch, dinner and toilet breaks, we should be able to finish our marathon Saturday, at 4 a.m. The latest. Wish us luck!


"How I write" series: Angela's guest post about how she writes will be posted at 11 p.m. French time.

"Jeepers Creepers": It was not what I expected at ALL. And the ending is not what you usually see in horror movies. I kinda recommend it--but don't bother buying it. At least not the full price--get it second hand if you really want the DVD.

Writing: My goal for today was to reach 45 000. I still need 458 words to make that happen and it's 1.30 a.m. *bites lip* Maybe I can still do it? Oh, and the chapter I'm working on is chapter 21. I've been waiting a week or two to write it and it is so sad. I'm even considering saving the characters, and if I did, it would be credible. It wouldn't be a "deus ex machina."

I'll see how it goes. Total word count: 44 542.

“The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.”

—Walter Bagehot

Why you should persevere in your writing

And once again, I'm awake and blogging after 4 in the morning. My excuse? I wrote 846 words but am still 3926 words behind. I think that's reason enough to stay up late.

But my main reason for this post is that my time line issues are over! It took me a week, lots of comfort food, music, tables and spreadsheets and multiple windows open side by side, but today I did it. With a bowl of my favorite biscuits (ginger nut), the door closed, a Textedit document and a NeoOffice document open, I finished untangling that knot.

This, in turn, helped me to keep writing chapter 21. Had I not persevered, I would not be writing chapter 21 today.

Conclusion? Persevere and ye shall be rewarded with a higher word count. And happiness.

Total word count: 43734

Percentage: 58.31

Chapter 21 stands at: 640 w0rds

-Kayleigh

PS: It would appear I'm not the only one who, in the month of August, has given herself a certain amount of words to write per day. Nikki-Lee and Angela have both giving themselves goals. Go to their blogs and congratulate and encourage them. Why? Ye shall be rewarded with a teaser on Nikki's blog and interesting facts about Japan on Angela's.

"Why?" you ask again.

Oh just go do it.

...

Because I say so!

"Mentally Fragile Teen Arrested in Stolen Car; Says She Was Looking for a Demon."

The post title is a quote from "My Soul To Save" by Rachel Vincent.

I'm back! And I've got lots of things to blog about: movies, books, writing, spending 6+ hours in a car stuck between my siblings.

First, though, an explanation for the lack of blogging and tweeting: internet stopped working on my laptop. My dad and I fiddled with the settings to fix one problem and ended up causing another without even solving the other problem. Typical. My dad fixed internet problem last night, or rather this morning, because it was 2 a.m.

Moving on.

Movies

Do NOT judge me for watching Disney movies. When you're lazy like I am and you sit down on the couch, you end up watching whatever's on. Anyway, the ones I watched weren't too bad.

• Dadnapped: Melissa's father is a writer, he gets kidnapped and she decides to save him. It was okay. Cliche: police ignores a kid's call because a kid can't possibly be telling the truth. Oh, your dad's been kidnapped? You saw it on a camera, you have proof? Call in a missing person's report in 48 hours. Ridiculous.
• Princess Protection Program: Demi Lovato plays a princess who moves in with a normal American family to protect her country and mother from some evil dictator guy. Meh.
• Wizards of Waverly Place: The movie: It was missing that something the TV show has, but overall I liked it.
• The Nanny Diaries: IMDB summary: A college graduate (Annie) goes to work as a nanny for a rich New York family. Ensconced in their home, she has to juggle their dysfunction, a new romance, and the spoiled brat in her charge.
  I loved it! Brilliant and I loved what Annie did at the end.
• The Bounty Hunter: Funny, but if wasn't for Gerard Butler, I don't think I would have wanted to see it. Unexpected ending.
• Friday the 13th: Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan: When a series of movies go on and on, the movies tend to get worse, but I actually liked this one. Of course, it's ridiculous that people running for their lives trip and stumble so much, but that happens in all horror movies. In real life, it's not like that. My dad would know: he once had an ostrich running after him. Once he was safe, my mom told him she'd never seen him run that fast when he played rugby. And did my dad trip/stumble/fall? No. When a person runs for their life, the adrenaline rush and fear means they don't trip. And the "Jason Takes Manhattan" part took ages to appear.

Books (there will be spoilers)

My Soul To Save: I finally finished reading it, but I'm still working my way through 4 books. Damn it! I shall start no more books, except the 3 books I have to read for school.

Anyway, what did I think of this book? I loved it as I love all of Rachel Vincent's books. Kaylee Cavanaugh is a banshee (written bean sidhe in the book) and in this book, the second in the Soul Screamer series, she wants to save a singer's soul: Addison Page sold her soul to become famous and rish, thus saving her family from poverty.

BIG SPOILER: Addison's sister ends up also selling her soul, making it even more difficult for Kaylee to save their souls before Addison dies. They know in advance that Addison will die on a Thursday, only days away. I was really hoping Addison wouldn't die, but she does. And Kaylee can't save Addison's soul. Sure, she saves Regan's, the little sister, but Addison's soul will be tortured for all eternity.

I wonder how Kaylee will deal with the guilt she feels. Also: for a YA series, it's pretty dark. Which I LOVE, because I'm weird that way.

Writing

My goal for August is to write 610 words every day. This will bring me to almost 60 000 words by the 31st. (Exactly: 59 995 words.) See how bad it's going? I'm 3552 words behind.

My goal for September is 500 words a day.

Other problems: I've got another time line problem. Here's what I emailed my critique partner:

It is so hard writing when you go from one POV to another, and have 8 POVs in total, and character X dies in chapter 14, on a Thursday but because chapter 20 takes place on a Wednesday, X is still alive. Not to mention character Y does/says stuff in chapter 14 that doesn't make sense anymore because of a secret revealed in chapter 20. All while making sure I alternate POVs often enough and keeping track of my huge cast of characters that keeps growing.

Let's say that the time line is a long piece of rope. That piece of rope is one giant knot that I've been trying to undo for the past few days. I have made very little progress.

Word count: 42 888.

Ghost Stories

So the first of August, I went to see Ghost Stories. Maybe you saw my two tweets?

Ghost stories starts in 20 minutes. Apparently it's really scary.

and then

Lights are dim. Cold air. Loud, scary noises. Wondering if this will scare me.

Having seen a LOT of horror movies, and only two of them scaring me to the point where I didn't finish them, I wasn't sure this could scare me. Did it?

Answer: Yes. It freaked me out, I jumped, I gasped, my heart raced and I was on edge for the next time something would make me jump.

The advantage a theater has over horror movies shown in cinemas or at home is they can involve more of our senses. We not only see and hear things: we can also smell and feel things. Such as the cold and the smell of [deleted].

At the end, they ask the audience not to reveal the twist, so I won't tell you anything. But if you like horror movies and you're looking for a good scare, and you live near London, then I urge you to go see it.

"Ghost Stories", I think, has reinstilled a fear of horror movies in me. Example? Please, I beg you, don't laugh, but in an episode of Wizards of Waverly Place, a ghost does this scary face where his head becomes huge and it made my heart race. But I think it's more that I was still jumpy from "Ghost Stories." But I was terrified of the dark for the following two nights.

Now I'm fine.

Mostly.

England: A trip into London

a.k.a HELL!

Well, okay, London itself isn't really hell, it's more the fact that I spent about 7 hours there with my family.

We took the train at twenty to two in the afternoon and the first shop we went into was a South African one. We bought biltong there. Delicious, wonderful biltong. Last time we had any was in The Netherlands, 3 years ago!

Our first official stop was at the Natural History Museum. We had to queue for fifteen minutes just to get INTO the damn museum. Then we had a look at some of the things on display in the hall before finding out we had to queue to see the dinosaur exhibition, the big one.

Oh, and we hadn't eaten lunch. So by the end of THAT, we were hungry and our feet were hurting.

After lunch in a Chinese place, where I found out I had the ability to use chopsticks properly, we went to Hamleys, the biggest toy shop in Europe. It was HELL for me.

Trafalgar Square: we climbed on one of the lions and our dad took a picture. I have a slight fear of heights, so that was only slightly scary.

And, the highlight of my day, Foyles. The bestest ever bookshop I've EVER been to. Yes, I am aware that is a bad sentence, but who cares. Not me.

Okay, so by the time we got to Foyles (it took us quite some time--got lost, arguing, sore feet), I was too exhausted to look at the books. I sat down half a minute then thought "Fuck it" and began looking at all the wonderful books!

One thing you should know about Foyles: it's a maze. Seriously. I kinda got lost in that place. But somehow, by just wandering around, I ended up in the Fantasy section, then Paranormal Romance, then Teen Noir, so all was good.

The books I got?

1. Thinner by Stephen King
2. Christine by Stephen King
3. Liar by Justine Larbalestier
4. The Dust of 100 dogs by A.S. King
5. The Mammoth Book of Vampire Romance (which has a short story by Rachel Vincent=reason I bought it)
6. Beauty and The Beast by Robin McKinley
7. The Carbon Diaries: 2017 by Saci Lloyd.

Oh, we also bought tickets for "The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert", the musical. We're going to see it tomorrow night. And tomorrow around 1 pm, I'm getting a haircut.

That's why today, Tuesday, is a relaxing day indoors.

Writing

Sunday: 261

Monday: 7

So far today: 0

Grrr...

Plotting

So I'm writing chapter 20 and I have no idea where the characters will take me.

However, I know, more or less, what chapters 21 and 22 will be about:

• A trial,
• sadness, and
  
• the last time we ever see characters L and J.

But who knows, things could change. Character M was SUPPOSED to be evil, and she turned out to be really kind.

I've also got a bit of problem with the timeline. And an idea just hit me. It's perfect.

England: Day 9

Day 7: Friday: I think we stayed in. I wrote 413 words.

Day 8: Saturday: I wrote 0 words. :( And we stayed in. Again. I don't mind, and it's actually partially my fault (I go to bed too late), but my mom's getting annoyed. Why? Because...

Day 9: Sunday: Today we were supposed to go out. I don't think that's gonna happen any more. It's 1pm.

Movies

• Harriet the Spy: Blogs Wars: Meh.
• I rewatched The Virgin Suicides.
• And that's it. I need to convince my family to watch Clash of the Titans (1981 version) with me.

Books

• I am reading "My Soul to Save" by Rachel Vincent, even though I should finish reading "Lolita", "The Sweet Far Thing" and "A Forest of Hands and Teeth" *is an idiot sometimes*.

I have weird dreams

As per usual, I don't even know where to start. Something about a guy and a girl, then he can't find the girl and it turns out he imagined her. And he shoots her in the forehead. Then she reappears, has a scar on her forehead from the bullet. She's now real, I think.

Then there was something with slides and tunnels and water and snakes. Oddly enough, I think I've had that dream before.

Then I was in some shopping center and then someone was chasing a friend and me. And the friend decided to carry me on her shoulders. Eventually we lost the guy chasing us and we sat down on a couch to watch TV. In the middle of the shopping center. And we hid under a sheet when he got close to finding us.

See what I mean by weird dreams?

Word count as it is now: 40271

Word count as I want it by tonight: 40 771.

England: Day 6, we go shopping

Movies (SPOILERS)

• Panic Room: Good. Although they were some moments when the mother and her daughter were SO stupid, but it's to be expected in thrillers, I suppose.
  
• Valentine's Day: Good. Better than I expected. Did NOT expect Julia Roberts to be the little boy's mother. I admit it: I teared up. And a lot of people are saying Taylor Swift's acting was horrible, but I honestly thought it was supposed to be cheesy and bad. If not: WOW. Scary.
  
• The Sixth Sense: Amazing. Yes, I know, it's taken me THIS long to see it. Whatever. My favorite line is: "They don't have meetings about rainbows."

Books (SPOILERS)

I finally finished reading "A Clockwork Orange" and all I have to say is: wow. Go read it if you don't mind books where the protagonist is evil.

(Warning: He doesn't give a shit about the law--he murders, steals and rapes. Other warning: Anthony Burgess invented slang for the teens called "nadsat". It takes a while to get used to.)

I saw the movie AGES ago, so I already knew what it was about. The one major difference is that chapter 21 of the book is ignored. Apparently, Stanley Kubrick wanted a realistic ending. In the book, Alex changes and wants to be good. In the movie, he goes back to being evil.

Anthony Burgess is really good: you end up rooting for Alex, even though you know what he's done. Time and time again, people betray him: his friends, his parents, strangers. And this makes you feel sorry for him.

Shopping

• Boots: I got girly stuff like a tangle teaser, moisturizer, etc. That's it. No clothes, no shoes. Couldn't really find anything...
  

Writing

Wednesday: 1110 words.

Thursday: 250 words. I'd like to write more, but I've got to wake up early to go to the Natural History Museum. Ugh.

Something that I realized at the hairdresser's (my mom got a haircut, and yes, as you would expect, it rained later on. But we had umbrellas) is that I have foreshadowing in chapter 6 for the thing that's revealed in chapter 18. This was NOT done on purpose, because even I had no idea that Fabienne was [deleted] until chapter 18. But this description in chapter 6 now makes more sense. I love when that happens. (And no, it does not happen very often.)

Total: 39858=53%

England: Day 3, we go out

Movies

• Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief: Eh. It was okay.
• Friday the 13th, Part 5: A New Beginning: Same.
• Another Cinderella Story: Meh. I REALLY liked the dancing scene with the mirror, but so many parts irritated me.
• Bring It On: Fight to the Finish: Ugh. When are they gonna stop making these movies? I loved the first one, but now I watch them to make fun of the dialogue and characters.
• Toy Story 3: *sigh* I'd heard people saying it was REALLY good and the movie did NOT disappoint. Very good.

Day 1 included the ferry ride and unpacking. Day 2 we stayed in and just watched TV. Day 3, Monday, we went out and did the following:

• WHSmith: Books! I got books! Hush, hush by Becca Fitzpatrick, Succubus Blues by Richelle Mead and Fang by James Patterson (the Maximum Ride series is my guilty pleasure). I also got "Clash of the Titans", the 1981 version.
• Pound shop: I got two pens and skittles. Boring, I know.
• Heart Foundation shop: DVDs! A Knight's Tale, Panic Room, IT and many others.

Day 4, Tuesday, we went to see Toy Story 3 and I got two DVDs for 5 pounds! "Thelma and Louise" and "Red Dawn" (my mom's comments: "But it's a boys' film. And it's ancient." How has she not realized by now that I LOVE "boys' movies and movies from the eighties?).

Day 5, Wednesday, which is today, we're staying in. Tomorrow, however, is a shopping day. Yippee.

Writing

Friday 730
Saturday 186
Sunday 732
Monday 287
Tuesday 58
Wednesday 131

And Wednesday is far from over.

Total word count: 38629

Oh, I was supposed to post this on Monday, but so many things got in the way (leaving the penthouse, internet not working, siblings wanting to watch movies) that I'm only posting this today.

In which I fail

Now remember, my goal is to write 250 words every single day. Minimum.

Sunday I wrote 102 words.
Monday I wrote 16 words.
So far today I've written 16 words. (But it's only twenty to 4 in the afternoon.)

My goal for today is to write 632 words. *dreams of writing 1k a day* That'd be heaven...

Total for the moment: 31 345/75 000

I have weird dreams

Seriously. I don't even know where to begin. Okay, actually I do know where to begin, but how on earth do I explain it?

I was in this... balloon. A donut-shaped balloon, where you had to walk to make it turn to reach the different shops in it. That probably makes no sense, but I don't know how to explain it better. Then there was a naked vampire woman and a bunch of people riding on bikes at night andsome other weird things... Very strange.